THE AMBER SPYGLASS- 第94部分

they　looked　at　her：　her　eyes　were　glittering　more　than　usual；　her　chin　was　held　high　with　a　look　shed　learned　from　will　without　knowing　it。　she　looked　defiant　as　well　as　lost；　dame　hannah　thought；　and　admired　her　for　it；　and　the　master　saw　something　else；　he　saw　how　the　childs　unconscious　grace　had　gone；　and　how　she　was　awkward　in　her　growing　body。　but　he　loved　the　girl　dearly；　and　he　felt　half…proud　and　half　in　awe　of　the　beautiful　adult　she　would　be；　so　soon。

he　said；　〃you　will　never　be　lost　while　this　college　is　standing；　lyra。　this　is　your　home　for　as　long　as　you　need　it。　as　for　money；　your　father　made　over　an　endowment　to　care　for　all　your　needs；　and　appointed　me　executor；　so　you　neednt　worry　about　that。〃

in　fact；　lord　asriel　had　done　nothing　of　the　sort；　but　jordan　college　was　rich；　and　the　master　had　money　of　his　own；　even　after　the　recent　upheavals。

〃no；〃　he　went　on；　〃i　was　thinking　about　learning。　youre　still　very　young；　and　your　education　until　now　has　depended　on。。。well；　quite　frankly；　on　which　of　our　scholars　you　intimidated　least；〃　he　said；　but　he　was　smiling。　〃its　been　haphazard。　now；　it　may　turn　out　that　in　due　course　your　talents　will　take　you　in　a　direction　we　cant　foresee　at　all。　but　if　you　were　to　make　the　alethiometer　the　subject　of　your　lifes　work；　and　set　out　to　learn　consciously　what　you　could　once　do　by　intuition。。。”

〃yes；〃　said　lyra　definitely。

〃…then　you　could　hardly　do　better　than　put　yourself　in　the　hands　of　my　good　friend　dame　hannah。　her　scholarship　in　that　field　is　unmatched。〃

〃let　me　make　a　suggestion；〃　said　the　lady；　〃and　you　neednt　respond　now。　think　about　it　for　a　while。　now；　my　college　is　not　as　old　as　jordan；　and　youre　too　young　yet　to　bee　an　undergraduate　in　any　case；　but　a　few　years　ago　we　acquired　a　large　house　in　north　oxford；　and　we　decided　to　set　up　a　boarding　school。

id　like　you　to　e　and　meet　the　headmistress　and　see　whether　youd　care　to　bee　one　of　our　pupils。　you　see；　one　thing　youll　need　soon；　lyra；　is　the　friendship　of　other　girls　of　your　age。　there　are　things　that　we　learn　from　one　another　when　were　young；　and　i　dont　think　that　jordan　can　provide　quite　all　of　them。　the　headmistress　is　a　clever　young　woman；　energetic；　imaginative；　kindly。　were　lucky　to　have　her。　you　can　talk　to　her；　and　if　you　like　the　idea；　e　and　make　st。　sophias　your　school；　as　jordan　is　your　home。　and　if　youd　like　to　begin　studying　the　alethiometer　systematically；　you　and　i　could　meet　for　some　private　lessons。　but　theres　time；　my　dear；　theres　plenty　of　time。　dont　answer　me　now。　leave　it　until　youre　ready。〃

〃thank　you；〃　said　lyra；　〃thank　you；　dame　hannah；　i　will。〃

the　master　had　given　lyra　her　own　key　to　the　garden　door　so　she　could　e　and　go　as　she　pleased。　later　that　night；　just　as　the　porter　was　locking　the　lodge；　she　and　pantalaimon　slipped　out　and　made　their　way　through　the　dark　streets；　hearing　all　the　bells　of　oxford　chiming　midnight。

once　they　were　in　the　botanic　garden；　pan　ran　away　over　the　grass　chasing　a　mouse　toward　the　wall；　and　then　let　it　go　and　sprang　up　into　the　huge　pine　tree　nearby。　it　was　delightful　to　see　him　leaping　through　the　branches　so　far　from　her；　but　they　had　to　be　careful　not　to　do　it　when　anyone　was　looking；　their　painfully　acquired　witch　power　of　separating　had　to　stay　a　secret。　once　she　would　have　reveled　in　showing　it　off　to　all　her　urchin　friends；　and　making　them　goggle　with　fear；　but　will　had　taught　her　the　value　of　silence　and　discretion。

she　sat　on　the　bench　and　waited　for　pan　to　e　to　her。　he　liked　to　surprise　her；　but　she　usually　managed　to　see　him　before　he　reached　her；　and　there　was　his　shadowy　form；　flowing　along　beside　the　riverbank。　she　looked　the　other　way　and　pretended　she　hadnt　seen　him；　and　then　seized　him　suddenly　when　he　leapt　onto　the　bench。

〃i　nearly　did　it；〃　he　said。

〃youll　have　to　get　better　than　that。　i　heard　you　ing　all　the　way　from　the　gate。〃

he　sat　on　the　back　of　the　bench　with　his　forepaws　resting　on　her　shoulder。

〃what　are　we　going　to　tell　her？〃　he　said。

〃yes；〃　she　said。　〃its　only　to　meet　this　headmistress；　anyway。　its　not　to　go　to　the　school。〃

〃but　we　will　go；　wont　we？〃

〃yes；〃　she　said；　〃probably。〃

〃it　might　be　good。〃

lyra　wondered　about　the　other　pupils。　they　might　be　cleverer　than　she　was；　or　more　sophisticated；　and　they　were　sure　to　know　a　lot　more　than　she　did　about　all　the　things　that　were　important　to　girls　of　their　age。　and　she　wouldnt　be　able　to　tell　them　a　hundredth　of　the　things　that　she　knew。　theyd　be　bound　to　think　she　was　simple　and　ignorant。

〃dyou　think　dame　hannah　can　really　do　the　alethiometer？〃　said　pantalaimon。

〃with　the　hooks；　im　sure　she　can。　i　wonder　how　many　books　there　are？　i　bet　we　could　learn　them　all；　and　do　without。　imagine　having　to　carry　a　pile　of　books　everywhere。。。　pan？〃

〃what？〃

〃will　you　ever　tell　me　what　you　and　wills　daemon　did　while　we　were　apart？〃

〃one　day；〃　he　said。　〃and　shell　tell　will；　one　day。　we　agreed　that　wed　know　when　the　time　had　e；　but　we　wouldnt　tell　either　of　you　till　then。〃

〃all　right；〃　she　said　peaceably。

she　had　told　pantalaimon　everything；　but　it　was　right　that　he　should　have　some　secrets　from　her；　after　the　way　shed　abandoned　him。

and　it　was　forting　to　think　that　she　and　will　had　another　thing　in　mon。　she　wondered　whether　there　would　ever　e　an　hour　in　her　life　when　she　didnt　think　of　him；　didnt　speak　to　him　in　her　head；

didnt　relive　every　moment　theyd　been　together；　didnt　long　for　his　voice　and　his　hands　and　his　love。　she　had　never　dreamed　of　what　it　would　feel　like　to　love　someone　so　much；　of　all　the　things　that　had　astonished　her　in　her　adventures；　that　was　what　astonished　her　the　most。　she　thought　the　tenderness　it　left　in　her　heart　was　like　a　bruise　that　would　never　go　away；　but　she　would　cherish　it　forever。

pan　slipped　down　to　the　bench　and　curled　up　on　her　lap。　they　were　safe　together　in　the　dark；　she　and　her　daemon　and　their　secrets。　somewhere　in　this　sleeping　city　were　the　books　that　would　tell　her　how　to　read　the　alethiometer　again；　and　the　kindly　and　learned　woman　who　was　going　to　teach　her；　and　the　girls　at　the　school；　who　knew　so　much　more　than　she　did。

she　thought；　they　dont　know　it　yet；　but　theyre　going　to　be　my　friends。

pantalaimon　murmured；　〃that　thing　that　will　said。。。〃

〃when？〃

〃on　the　beach；　just　before　you　tried　the　alethiometer。　he　said　there　wasnt　any　elsewhere。　it　was　what　his　father　had　told　you。　but　there　was　something　else。〃

〃i　remember。　he　meant　the　kingdom　was　over；　the　kingdom　of　heaven；　it　was　all　finished。　we　shouldnt　live　as　if　it　mattered　more　than　this　life　in　this　world；　because　where　we　are　is　always　the　most　important　place。〃

〃he　said　we　had　to　build　something。。。〃

〃thats　why　we　needed　our　full　life；　pan。　we　would　have　gone　with　will　and　kirjava；　wouldnt　we？〃

〃yes。　of　course！　and　they　would　have　e　with　us。　but。。。”

〃but　then　we　wouldnt　have　been　able　to　build　it。　no　one　could　if　they　put　themselves　first。　we　have　to　be　all　those　difficult　things　like　cheerful　and　kind　and　curious　and　patient；　and　weve　got　to　study　and　think　and　work　hard；　all　of　us；　in　all　our　different　worlds；　and　then　well　build。。。〃

her　hands　were　resting　on　his　glossy　fur。　somewhere　in　the　garden　a　nightingale　was　singing；　and　a　little　breeze　touched　her　hair　and　stirred　the　leaves　overhead。　all　the　different　bells　of　the　city　chimed；　once　each；　this　one　high；　that　one　low；　some　close　by；　others　farther　off；　one　cracked　and　peevish；　another　grave　and　sonorous；　but　agreeing　in　all　their　different　voices　on　what　the　time　was；　even　if　some　of　them　got　to　it　a　little　more　slowly　than　others。　in　that　other　oxford　where　she　and　will　had　kissed　good…bye；　the　bells　would　be　chiming；　too；　and　a　nightingale　would　be　singing；　and　a　little　breeze　would　be　stirring　the　leaves　in　the　botanic　garden。

〃and　then　what？〃　said　her　daemon　sleepily。　〃build　what？〃

〃the　republic　of　heaven；〃　said　lyra。

the　end

。。。！

　　，