And Now, And Here- 第77部分

at　the　moment　of　death　i　will　be　the　sum　of　my　whole　life。

let　me　put　it　this　way：　life　is　a　spread　out　phenomenon；　death　is　a　condensed　one。

in　other　words；　life　is　a　vast　expanse；　while　death　is　the　total；　cumulative；　condensation　of　this　whole　expanse　……　the　abridgment　of　it。

death　is　very　atomic。

everything　has　e　together　in　one　atom；　thats　why　there　is　no　other　phenomenon　greater　than　death。

but　it　occurs　only　once。

this　does　not　mean；　however；　that　you　have　not　died　before。

no；　it　has　occurred　many　times　before；　but　it　occurs　only　once　in　one　lifetime。

and　if　you　have　lived　this　life　remaining　asleep；　then　death　also　takes　place　in　the　state　of　sleep。

it　es　anew　in　the　next　life；　and　again　occurs　only　once。

so　keep　in　mind；　one　who　dies　a　conscious　death　takes　a　conscious　birth　in　the　next　life　……　that　bees　the　other　part　of　his　dying。

and　the　life　of　one　who　dies　and　takes　birth　consciously　functions　on　a　totally　different　plane。

for　the　first　time；　he　is　able　to　grab　hold　of　the　entire　meaning　of　life；　of　the　whole　purpose　of　life；　of　the　heights　and　depths　of　life；　precisely　and　consciously。

he　is　able　to　grasp　the　whole　truth　of　life。

so；　i　have　mentioned　two　things。

first；　in　order　that　you　may　have　a　conscious　death；　bee　alert　to　the　suffering；　be　aware　of　it。

dont　run　away　from　pain；　dont　escape　from　misery。

the　second　thing　i　said；　while　moving　around　and　performing　your　day…to…day　activities；　sud…denly　stop　and　bee　a　witness　for　a　moment。

then　resume　your　activity。

if　you　can　bee　a　witness　even　for　a　few　moments　in　twenty…four　hours；　you　will　find　all　of　a　sudden　what　a　big　madhouse　this　world　is；　and　how；　by　being　a　witness；　you　step　out　of　it。

when　someone　swears　at　you；　immediately　you　bee　such　a　recipient　you　lose　sight　of　the　person　swearing　at　you。

as　soon　as　he　swears　at　you；　you　receive　it。

in　fact；　you　receive　it　even　before　the　words　leave　his　lips。

you　receive　the　whole　of　it　before　the　swearer　has　even　managed　to　plete　it。

actually；　you　receive　twice　as　much　as　is　sworn　at　you。

even　the　person　swearing　is　taken　aback　to　see　how　you　received　more　than　he　swore。

you　pletely　fail　to　see　what　is　happening。

if　you　could　really　see

next　time　when　someone　swears　at　you；　bee　a　watcher；　dont　be　a　receiver。

just　be　there　and　watch　the　person　swearing　at　you。

it　will　cause　you　to　laugh　at　yourself；　and　the　laughter　will　be　liberating。

you　will　laugh　at　your　being　the　constant　recipient　of　profanities　all　through　your　life。

perhaps　you　may　even　thank　him　and　go　your　way。

doing　so；　you　may　leave　the　poor　man　guessing；　because　such　an　act　would　be　beyond　his　prehension。

he　would　be　totally　at　a　loss。

in　a　period　of　twenty…four　hours；　whatsoever　may　happen　……　in　anger；　in　hate；　in　love；　in　friendship；　in　enmity；　while　walking；　resting；　whatever　……　watch　it　sometimes　for　a　moment；　just　for　a　moment。

give　yourself　a　jolt　just　for　one　moment　and　watch　whats　happening　with　awareness。

at　that　moment　dont　be　a　recipient；　simply　be　a　watcher　of　whatever　is　happening。

such　calm　will　surround　you　in　that　moment：　you　will　bee　so　very　aware；　because　at　that　moment　you　will　be　filled　with　meditation。

that　very　moment　of　awareness　is　the　moment　of　meditation。

if　one　could　carry　on　these　two　experiments；　then　the　rest　of　the　things　you　have　asked　will　follow。

for　instance；　you　ask；　〃if　a　seeker　practices　celibacy；　will　it　help　in　death？　will　he　attain　awareness？〃　in　fact；　he　alone　can　attain　celibacy　who　bees　a　witness；　not　otherwise。

one　who　indulges　is　sure　to　remain　sexual。

an　indulgent　person　means　one　who　is　lustful。

he　wants　to　indulge　in　sex。

if　one　could　be　a　witness；　lust　and　sex　would　slowly　and　gradually　disappear　from　ones　life。

if　a　man　could　bee　a　witness　during　intercourse；　perhaps　he　would　never　enter　into　it　again；　because　everything　would　seem　so　meaningless；　so　worthless。

everything　would　look　so　childish　that　he　might　e　to　feel；　〃whats　going　on？　whats　happening？　whats　all　this　anyway？　how　have　i　managed　to　do　this　up　to　now？　why　has　all　of　this　such　a　hold　over　me？〃　but　since　we　dont　bee　a　witness；　we　keep　on　repeating　it。

actually；　dont　ever　be　a　witness　if　you　wish　to　continue　repeating　your　mistakes。

every　mistake　will　then　repeat　itself。

then　again；　every　mistake　has　its　own　season；　just　goes　on　recurring。

if　you　could　keep　a　daily　record　of　your　life　for　a　few　months；　you　would　immediately　find　yourself　to　be　one　of　those　who　are　periodically　mad。

just　this　afternoon　i　received　a　letter　from　a　friend。

he　bees　insane　every　six　months；　and　for　the　other　six　months　he　remains　sane。

he　often　used　to　ask　me　why　this　happens　to　him。

i　said；　〃you　are　able　to　know　the　difference　because　the　duration　of　your　sane　and　insane　states　is　clearly　defined。

this　is　not　so　with　other　people。

they　remain　insane　half　a　dozen　times　and　are　sane　half　a　dozen　times　during　the　day；　hence　they　are　not　able　to　figure　it　out。

you　stay　insane　for　a　solid　period　of　six　months　and　remain　sane　for　another　whole　six　months。

the　contrast　is　very　clear。

〃　ordinarily；　a　person　goes　mad　ten　times　a　day　and　behaves　normally　the　other　ten。

neither　does　he　know　nor　do　other　people　know　when　he　is　sane　and　when　he　is　insane。

if；　for　a　few　months；　you　could　keep　a　plete　record　of　what　goes　on　in　your　life；　it　will　immediately　bee　clear　to　you　that　all　things　repeat　themselves。

for　example；　anger　recurs　at　almost　the　same　time　each　day。

each　day；　you　not　only　feel　hungry　at　a　fixed　time；　you　get　angry　at　a　fixed　time　too。

you　feel　hungry　exactly　at　eleven　oclock。

as　soon　as　the　clock　strikes　eleven　or　twelve　or　one　in　the　afternoon；　whatever；　you　feel　hungry。

at　whichever　time　you　take　your　meals；　you　feel　hungry　at　that　particular　time。

the　body　tells　you　it　is　hungry。

in　the　same　manner；　you　feel　angry；　sexual；　loving；　at　a　set　time。

these　are　all　hungers　too；　and　they　arise　at　a　fixed　time。

you　go　on　repeating　the　same　mistakes；　because　you　have　never　tried　to　realize　the　fact　that　whatsoever　you　do　is　all　mechanical　routine。

and　occasionally；　this　creates　a　problem。

for　example；　you　are　hungry　and　there　is　no　food　around。

only　then　do　you　e　to　know　you　are　hungry。

if　you　find　food　when　you　are　hungry；　you　will　never　know　what　hunger　is。

the　matter　is　taken　care　of。

similarly；　when　you　are　angry　and　there　is　no　one　around　to　vent　your　anger　upon；　only　then　can　you　know　what　anger　is。

but　you　do　find　someone　around。

sometimes　it　happens　that　you　are　hungry　and　there　is　no　food　around；　but　it　is　very　rare　that　you　may　not　find　anyone　on　whom　you　can　air　your　anger。

and　when　there　is　no　one　at　hand；　a　person　takes　his　anger　out　on　inanimate　objects。

if　nothing　else；　he　bangs　his　fountain　pen；　swearing　at　it。

if　this　man　ever　bees　aware　of　what　he　has　done；　what　will　he　think　of　himself？　what　will　this　man　think；　really？　

a　great　deal　of　research　is　being　done　in　america　to　find　the　psychological　causes　for　car　accidents　……　in　a　large　number　we　seem　to　be　responsible。

in　a　state　of　anger；　a　man　presses　the　accelerator　harder　without　being　aware　of　it。

perhaps；　mentally；　he　may　be　pressing　his　wifes　head；　or　his　sons　throat；　but　in　that　particular　moment　his　foot　is　on　the　accelerator。

in　this　case　the　accelerator　is　a　substitute　for　his　wife　or　son。

he　goes　on　pressing　and　forgets　he　is　driving　a　car。

in　fact；　he　is　riding　on　his　anger；　but　no　one　knows　what　he　is　doing。

the　danger　is　obvious。

the　car　has　nothing　to　do　with　this　mans　anger；　the　car　has　no　knowledge　of　his　anger。

so　far；　we　have　not　been　able　to　create　a　built…in　system；　such　that　the　car　will　refuse　to　move　if　the　driver　is　angry。

we　have　not　been　able　to　develop　any　such　mechanism。

the　man　presses　the　accelerator；　and　the　car　takes　it　to　mean　he　wants　to　raise　the　speed。

the　car　doesnt　know　it　needs　to　go　slow　at　that　moment。

it　doesnt　realize　the　man　is　in　a　dangerous　situation；　that　the　man　is　unable　to　see　anything　at　that　moment。

within　a　period　of　twenty…four　hours；　the　moments　of　anger；　the　moments　of　sex；　keep　recurring。

we　move　in　a　set　pattern　like　a　machine。

if　you　wake　up　and　see；　you　may　ask；　〃am　i　really　living；　or　am　i　just　moving　in　a　circle　like　an　ox　at　a　wheel？〃　living；　obviously；　cannot　be　similar　to　being　an　ox　at　a　wheel。

how　can　there　be　any　life　in　moving　round　and　round　like　an　ox　at　a　wheel？　the　oimply　moves　mechanically。

has　this　ever　occurred　to　you？　

i　was　reading　a　book　about　a　marvelous　man　who　has　done　a　wonderful　experiment。

he　observed　that　you　e　across　a　man　on　the　street　and　he　says；　〃hello；　how　are　you？〃　and　you　answer；　〃i　am　fine；　thank　you。

〃　you　may　not　have　realized　that　the　man　neither　cared　to　listen　to　your　reply；　nor　had　he　asked　the　question　with　the　intent　of　hearing　your　answer。

he　must　be　wanting　to　ask　something　else。

since　it　would　have　looked　a　little　odd　to　start　off　abruptly；　he　began　by　asking；　〃how　are　you？〃　

even　on　the　phone；　the　man　asks；　〃how　is　your　health？〃　……　although　he　couldnt　care　less　about　your　health；　he　has