And Now, And Here- 第71部分

〃　you　will　have　to　raise　consciousness　in　order　to　move　forward；　because　as　you　move　ahead　on　the　bridge；　youll　bee　more　and　more　aware　……　only　then　will　you　be　able　to　advance。

moving　ahead　means　only　one　thing：　bee　more　and　more　aware。

this　too　is　a　matter　of　choice；　and　it　is　up　to　you　and　up　to　everyone　else　what　to　choose。

you　cant　make　anyone　else　responsible　for　it；　because　there　is　no　one　sitting　up　above　who　can　be　blamed　for　causing　you　to　make　a　wrong　choice。

there　is　nobody　up　there。

the　sky　is　empty。

there　is　no　god　or　goddess；　no　divine　being　sitting　up　in　heaven　whom　you　can　drag　into　the　court　and　say；　〃we　were　moving　along　on　a　right　path；　you　made　us　go　astray　a　little。

〃　you　wont　be　able　to　say；　〃things　would　have　worked　out　better　had　you　kept　yourself　out　of　it。

〃　

there　is　no　one　you　can　address　like　that；　hence　there　is　no　way　to　do　it。

ultimately　the　individual　is　responsible。

he　is　responsible　for　the　good　as　well　as　the　bad。

there　is　no　one　else　you　can　hold　responsible；　who　can　answer　why　a　certain　thing　happened　……　there　is　no　one　at　all。

of　course　those　who　have　gone　ahead　say；　crying　loudly；　〃dont　turn　back　in　fear；　because　much　joy　lies　ahead　of　you。

once　you　reach　there；　all　worries；　all　restlessness；　all　misery　es　to　an　end。

〃　they　say　this；　shouting　aloud；　but　their　voices　sound　strange　to　us　because　the　place　from　where　they　speak　is　unknown　to　us。

〃how　can　we　attain　bliss？〃　is　how　it　appears　to　us。

if；　advancing　this　far；　so　much　pain　has　been　our　lot；　how　much　more　of　the　same　will　not　e　to　us　if　we　move　even　further　ahead？　so　a　man　feels　he　should　turn　back　to　where　misery　did　not　exist。

everyone　says　how　blissful　childhood　was；　so　if　man　could；　he　would　immediately　return　to　the　state　of　childhood。

since　he　cannot；　he　stays　where　he　is。

man　says　there　was　no　misery　in　childhood。

he　may　even　go　a　step　further　and　say；　〃it　was　so　blissful　being　in　the　mothers　womb。

〃　if　he　could；　he　would　love　to　be　back　there；　but　he　cannot。

so　he　moves　on　ahead。

we　can　choose　to　regress　in　life；　we　can　return　to　the　unconscious　state；　we　can　find　ways　of　being　unconscious　……　if　thats　what　we　want。

we　dont　even　understand　the　language　of　the　voices　that　e　from　afar　because　we　have　no　idea　what　bliss　is。

we　dont　even　know　what　sort　of　thing　it　is　that　people　call　bliss。

we　are　familiar　with　what　misery　is　……　all　too　familiar；　as　a　matter　of　fact。

we　also　know　the　more　we　tried　to　attain　happiness；　the　more　we　found　misery。

now　we　are　afraid　lest；　in　our　quest　for　bliss；　we　land　ourselves　in　more　trouble。

since　we　came　across　more　misery　trying　to　find　happiness；　we　take　the　state　of　bliss　to　be　more　or　less　similar　to　the　state　of　happiness　……　perhaps　as　a　little　more　intense　state　of　happiness。

but　we　are　afraid　of　facing　trouble　as　well。

the　fact　remains　that　in　attempting　to　gain　happiness　we　encountered　pain；　so　now；　in　an　effort　to　find　bliss；　the　fear　is　we　may　have　to　face　even　more　trouble；　even　greater　misery。

so　we　hear　these　voices　ing　from　far　away；　and　with　folded　hands　we　salute　and　say　to　the　people　of　the　other　shore；　〃you　are　gods；　you　are　avataras；　you　are　tirthankaras；　you　are　great！　we　will　worship　you；　but　we　want　to　go　back！〃　

we　are　afraid　of　the　unknown。

the　fear　is　we　will　lose　whatever　little　happinesses　we　have　collected；　they　seem　to　be　dropping　away　as　we　move　ahead。

the　reason　is　we　have　built　our　houses　on　the　very　bridge　that　was　only　meant　to　be　crossed。

we　have　started　living　there。

we　have　settled　down　there；　we　have　turned　it　into　our　living　room。

now　when　someone　tells　us　to　move　ahead；　we　feel　worried　about　losing　the　things　we　have　gathered　around　us。

it　bees　obvious　that　moving　ahead　means　leaving　behind　whatsoever　we　now　have。

so　we　say；　〃let　the　time　e。

when　i　am　old；　when　death　is　at　hand；　when　all　i　have　begins　to　drop；　thats　when　i　will　e　forward　right　away。

then　there　wont　be　anything　to　worry　about。

〃　but　the　closer　we　e　to　death；　the　stronger　the　grip　bees。

as　death　approaches　we　close　our　fists　more　tightly。

thats　why　an　old　man　bees　utterly　miserly；　a　young　man　is　never　so　miserly。

an　old　man　bees　a　miser　in　every　way。

he　holds　tight。

at　the　time　of　his　departure　the　old　man　bees　paranoid　lest　everything　he　is　holding　on　to　might　slip　through　his　hands。

he　holds　his　possessions　firmly；　lest　his　grip　loosen。

this　very　clinging　to　things　so　firmly　turns　one　into　an　ugly　old　man；　otherwise；　the　beauty　and　grace　of　an　old　man　can　be　matchless。

we　are　aware　of　beautiful　children　and　we　know　of　less　beautiful　young　people；　but　beautiful　old　men　are　very　rare　to　find。

only　once　in　a　while　does　one　e　across　someone　who　has　grown　into　a　beautiful　old　man。

otherwise；　ordinarily；　with　the　increasing　miserliness　and　holding　fast　to　possessions；　everything　starts　being　uglier　and　uglier。

an　open　hand　looks　beautiful；　a　closed　fist　looks　ugly。

freedom　is　beautiful；　attachment　is　slavery。

everyone　thinks　he　will　give　up　his　attachments　sometime　in　the　future；　at　the　right　opportunity。

he　waits　u
　。。



Chapter　12

（／小｜说｜网）
the　distance　makes　the　difference

3　august　1970　pm　in　bombay；　india　

question　1　

in　order　for　one　to　stay　awake　at　the　time　of　death；　or　in　order　for　one　to　successfully　experience　a　conscious　death　in　meditation；　please　explain　in　detail　how　a　seeker　should　work　on　the　following：　the　body　system；　the　breathing　system；　the　state　of　breathing；　the　state　of　ones　being；　celibacy；　the　state　of　ones　mind。

before　one　can　remain　conscious　in　the　moment　of　death；　first　one　needs　to　prepare　to　stay　conscious　in　pain　and　suffering。

ordinarily；　it　is　not　possible　for　one　who　bees　unconscious　even　in　misery　to　stay　awake　at　the　time　of　death。

one　needs　to　understand　what　it　means　to　bee　unconscious　when　in　misery。

that　will　make　one　understand　what　it　means　to　be　conscious　in　misery　too。

being　unconscious　when　one　is　in　misery　means　one　has　identified　oneself　with　the　misery。

when　you　have　a　headache；　you　dont　feel　any　distance　between　the　headache　and　yourself；　you　dont　remain　just　a　distant　watcher。

rather；　you　feel　as　if　you　are　in　pain。

when　you　have　a　fever；　it　doesnt　feel　as　though　the　body　is　hot；　somewhere　at　a　distance　from　you；　instead　you　feel　as　if　you　have　bee　hot。

this　is　identification。

when　your　foot　is　hurt　and　wounded；　you　dont　feel　just　the　affected　foot；　rather；　you　feel　as　if　you　are　hurt　and　wounded。

basically；　we　dont　feel　any　distance　between　ourselves　and　our　bodies。

we　live　identified　with　the　body。

when　hunger　arises；　one　doesnt　say　his　body　is　hungry　and　he　is　aware　if　it；　instead　he　says；　〃i　am　hungry。

〃　but　this　is　not　the　truth。

the　truth　is；　the　body　is　hungry　and　he　is　aware　of　it。

he　is　simply　the　center　of　awareness　……　continuously　aware　of　whatsoever　is　happening。

if　there　is　a　thorn　hurting　the　foot；　he　knows　it；　if　there　is　a　headache；　he　knows　it；　if　the　stomach　needs　food；　he　knows　it。

man　is　consciousness；　consciousness　which　is　continuously　aware。

he　is　not　the　experiencer；　he　is　simply　the　knower。

this　is　the　reality。

but　our　state　of　mind　is　not　that　of　the　knower；　it　is　that　of　the　experiencer。

when　the　knower　turns　into　being　the　experiencer；　when　he　knows　not；　but　rather　bees　identified　with　the　act　itself；　when　he　does　not　remain　a　witness　watching　from　a　distance；　but　rather　bees　the　participant　in　the　act；　that　is　when　the　identification　takes　place。

then　he　bees　one　with　the　act。

this　identification　prevents　him　from　waking　up；　because　in　order　to　be　awake；　in　order　to　be　aware；　a　certain　distance　is　required；　a　space　is　needed。

i　am　able　to　see　you　only　because　there　is　a　distance　between　you　and　me。

if　the　whole　distance　between　you　and　me　were　to　be　removed；　i　wouldnt　be　able　to　see　you。

i　am　able　to　see　you　because　there　is　a　space　between　us。

if　this　entire　space　were　somehow　eliminated；　it　wouldnt　be　possible　for　me　to　see　you。

my　eyes　can　see　you；　because　there　is　a　space　in　between　but　my　very　eyes　are　unable　to　see　themselves。

even　if　i　need　to　see　my　figure；　i　have　to　bee　the　other　in　a　mirror；　i　have　to　be　at　a　distance　from　myself　……　only　then　can　i　see　my　reflection。

seeing　the　reflection　in　a　mirror　means　my　image　is　at　a　distance；　and　now　it　is　visible　to　me。

all　that　a　mirror　does　is　present　your　image　at　a　distance　from　you。

the　intervening　space　thus　created　enables　you　to　see。

in　order　to　see；　a　distance　is　needed。

for　one　who　lives　identified　with　the　body；　or　thinks　he　is　the　very　body；　there　exists　no　distance　between　him　and　his　body。

once　there　was　a　mohammedan　mystic　called　farid。

a　man　came　to　see　him　one　morning　and　raised　the　same　question　you　have　asked　me。

he　said　to　farid；　〃we　have　heard　that　when　jesus　was　crucified　he　did　not　cry　out；　scream；　or　grow　miserable。

we　have　also　heard　that　when　mansoors　limbs　were　cut　off；　he　was　laughing。

how　can　this　be？　this　is　impossible。

〃　

farid　didnt　say　a　word。

he　laughed；　and　from　the　coconuts　offered　to　him　by　his　devotees；　he　picked