what knowledge can i have？〃
just try to feel what ananda must have gone through。
put yourself in his shoes。
can you see his difficulty？ when it was night and everyone had left； he touched buddhas feet and said； 〃are you trying to kill me？ what are you doing？ i almost lost my life！ never have i been so upset and restless as i have been today。
what is this you have been saying and doing the whole day？ are you in your right mind？ are you sure you know what you said today？ in the morning you said one thing； in the afternoon another； and in the evening you gave an entirely different answer to the same question。
〃
buddha said； 〃i did not give these answers to you。
i gave my answers to the people concerned。
why did you listen to them？ do you think it is right to hear what i say to others？〃
ananda said； 〃now this tops it all！ how in the world could i not hear？ i was present； right there； my ears were not blocked！ and could it ever be possible i wouldnt want to hear you speak？ i love to hear you speak； no matter who you talk to。
〃
buddha said； 〃but why are you upset？ i didnt answer you！〃
ananda said； 〃maybe not； but i am in a quandary。
please answer me； right now。
what is the truth？ why did you give three different answers？〃
buddha explained； 〃i had to bring the three of them to a point of balance。
the man who came in the morning was an atheist。
being an atheist only he was inplete； because life is made of opposites。
〃
keep this in mind： a truly religious person is both …… an atheist on one hand； and a believer in god on the other hand。
his life contains both aspects； but he brings harmony between the two opposites。
religion is in that very harmony。
and one who is only a believer in god lacks religious maturity。
he has not yet attained a balance in his life。
so buddha said； 〃i had to bring a balance to his life。
one side of him had bee very heavy； so i had to put some rocks on the other scale。
and besides； i also wanted to unsettle him； because somehow he had bee convinced there is no god。
his conviction needed to be shaken up； because one who bees certain； dies。
the journey must go on； the search must continue。
〃the man who came in the afternoon was a theist。
i had to tell him i was an atheist because he had bee lopsided too； he had also lost his balance。
life is a balance。
one who attains this balance attains the truth。
〃
the reason i say to you； you should learn the art of dying is because your life has bee lopsided。
you are sitting very solidly on the scale of life； and so everything has turned to rock。
life has bee solidified； the balance is gone。
go ahead。
invite death as well。
say； 〃e and be my guest too。
well stay together。
〃 the day life agrees to live with death； it is transformed into life supreme。
the day one weles death； gives it a hug； embraces it； the matter is over！ that day the sting of death departs。
the sting lay in our running away from death； in our being afraid of it。
when a person es forward and embraces death； death loses； death is conquered； because the man who embraces death bees immortal。
now death cant do anything to him。
what can death do when the man himself is ready to disappear？
there are two types of people …… one whom death seeks and the other who seeks death。
death seeks those who run away from it。
and there are those who seek death； but it keeps eluding them。
they search endlessly but cant find death。
what kind of a person would you like to be …… the one who runs away from death or the one who embraces it？ a person eluding death will continue to be defeated； his entire life will be a lifelong story of defeat。
one who embraces death will instantly triumph over it； defeat will no longer exist in his life。
then his life bees a triumphant journey。
yes； i teach the very art of dying。
i am teaching you how to die so you may attain life。
do you know a secret？ the man who learns how to live in darkness …… the moment he accepts the totality of darkness； the darkness turns into light for him。
do you know that the man who takes poison lovingly； joyfully； as if he were taking nectar …… the poison bees nectar for him？ if you dont； then you must find out。
one of the most profound truths of life is that the man who accepts poison lovingly； the poison no longer remains poison for him …… it turns into nectar。
and the man who has accepted darkness itself； wholeheartedly； finds to his astonishment that darkness has bee light。
and one who greets pain with open arms； finds there is no pain at all …… only happiness remains for him。
for one who accepts his state of agitation and agrees to live with it； the doors of peace and tranquility are thrown open。
this seems contradictory。
remember； however； that one who says he wants to attain peace can never bee peaceful； because to say 〃i want to attain peace；〃 is； in fact； looking for disturbance。
man is restless as he is； and yet there are some who create a new restlessness by saying； 〃we want to be peaceful。
〃
once a man came to me。
he said； 〃i have been to the ramana ashram； to pondicherry； and to the ramakrishna ashram …… they are all full of hypocrisy。
i couldnt find anything else there。
i am looking for peace； which i find nowhere。
i have been wandering in search of it for the last two years。
in pondicherry someone mentioned your name。
i have e straight from there。
i want peace。
〃
i said； 〃get up and walk out that door right this moment； otherwise i shall be proven to be a hypocrite as well。
〃
he said； 〃what do you mean？〃
i said； 〃simply get out。
and dont ever look back in this direction again。
it is better i save myself before i am called a hypocrite as well。
〃
〃but i have e to find peace；〃 the man said。
〃simply get lost；〃 i said。
〃and let me ask you this： who did you go to and ask how to be in agony？ which guru has initiated you into agitation？ which ashram did you go to； to learn how to be restless？〃
〃i went nowhere；〃 the man replied。
then i said； 〃you are such a clever fellow； you can even create mental disturbance for yourself。
then what is there for me to teach you？〃 the way you have created your agitation； take an opposite route and you will find peace。
what do you want from me？ dont tell anyone you came to see me too； even by mistake。
i have nothing to do with whats happening to you！〃
the man said； 〃please show me the way to find peace。
〃
i told him； 〃you are looking for ways of being agitated。
there is only one way to attain peace： be at peace with restlessness。
〃
one who accepts restlessness in its totality； one who says； 〃e； stay with me。
be my guest in this very home；〃 suddenly finds the restlessness has left him。
with the change in our state of mind the restlessness departs。
one who accepts even the restlessness itself； his mind quiets down。
how can restlessness last if the mind is attuned to peace？
even though it may be a nonacceptance of restlessness； the very restlessness itself is the product of our attitude of nonacceptance。
one who says he will not accept being restless will continue to be restless； because this very non…acceptance is itself the root of restlessness。
a man says； 〃i wont accept restlessness； i cant accept suffering； i cant accept death； i cant accept darkness。
〃 thats just fine； dont accept them …… but you will continue to be surrounded by what you will not accept。
instead； see what happens by accepting； by agreeing to something no one else wants to agree to。
and to your great surprise you will find what you considered your enemy became your friend。
if you invite your enemy to be your guest； what other course is there for him but to bee your friend？
the reason for my discussing these issues with you for three days was because i saw you came here with the desire to conquer death。
you must have thought i would let you in on some trick so you would never die。
a friend has written a letter in which he says：
question 2
are you going to show us how to rejuvenate our bodies？ are you going to show some alchemical method to bee young again？ if thats the case then its worth spending our money to e there。
maybe you have e here with the same idea too。
if so； you will be disappointed； because i am teaching the art of dying here。
i say unto you： die！ learn how to die。
why run away from death？ accept it； wele it。
and remember； i am giving you the very key to be victorious over death。
rejuvenation is not the key for attaining victory over death。
no matter how much you go through a process of rejuvenation； you will still have to die。
the body is sure to die。
rejuvenation can only push death a little further away； death can be avoided a little longer。
it only means your problems will be extended over a longer period …… instead of dying in seventy years； you might be able to die in seven hundred years。
the suffering you could have otherwise finished with in seventy years will be prolonged for seven hundred years …… what else？ the troubles of seventy years will extend to seven hundred。
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